Prat Humor Equality, NOW!

Rad Girls? Has anyone seen this show? I've known about it for a while now, just through their ads on Fuse. I didn't think twice about it...just some 'girls behaving badly' type of deal.

Well, ohmygod it's horrible.

Joe summed it up by saying, "How can we be subversive without being entertaining?"

While Jackass isn't my cup of tea, there was a lot of it that was funny. Ok, maybe not a lot, but it was still humorous. But Rad Girls take the cake.

Perhaps it was just the one episode, but I have a feeling it's all like that.

I can't exactly put my finger on it, because most of what they were showing has already been done...pube hair humor, sliding down stairs (they were wearing helmets and had mats at the bottom - Jackass would so not approve, ladies), and pants peeing.
What it is, is that guys have done all this before. And everyone laughs. So if a girl does it, it'd be just as funny, right?

I don't know.

I do know though, that there aren't as many female comedians as their male counterparts. Why? Can men only do slapstick, and be universally appealing? Is it a clear cut gender issue? Cultural definitions and restraints? Anyone have any ideas?

Ohh man.

Tina Fey, where are you? Sarah Silverman, pleaseplease teach a class.

Happy Memorial Day!

I was watching Rambo III last night.
Don't judge me.

Joe was having a mini-movie marathon of action flicks, because he sat through Vanity Fair the other day.

There was one scene where Rambo puts gun powder on a wound and ignites it to close it up. This apparently reminded Joe of something...

Joe: "Didn't you ever break open a blackcat to get the powder out, to light it?"

Me: "No. I was a girl. Remember? I played with Barbies."

Joe: "But G.I. Joe had to introduce Barbie to explosives at some point. Like, 'Look Barbie {explosion sound effects} AHH AH! My hand! Noo!'"

Me: "My Barbie never would've dated a deformed G.I. Joe."

Joe: "You mean, she wouldn't have married G.I. Joe if his face was melted off?"

Me: "Nope!"

I'm featured

http://etsians.blogspot.com/

Go find me

:D

Not-So-Weekly Recipe

Here's one of my favorite meals...

Chicken Pot Pie

ingredients:

1 can reduced fat condensed cream of chicken soup
1 can mixed vegetables (pick out all the lima beans, because really...who likes lima beans?)
1 can diced potatoes
2 -3 cooked chicken breasts, chopped into bite size pieces
1 cup Bisquick mix
1/2 cup fat free milk
1 egg

directions:

1. Preheat oven to 350*
2. Dump vegetables, potatoes, and soup (no water), into a 9" pie plate...or other similar sized pan. Mix in chicken. Stir until everything is coated.
3. In a separate bowl, mix together Bisquick, milk, and egg. Pour batter on top of chicken/vegie mix in the pie plate. The batter will stay on top, baking up into a biscut-like crust.
4. Bake for 30 minutes. I find that putting a sheet of tin foil on the rack under the pie plate saves a lot of clean up hassle in case the pot pie boils over. The crust should turn golden brown, and the inside boils up a little.

Total comfort food that's easy to make.

Enjoy!

We're really not as far apart in age as this makes us seem:

Joe and I saw Bobby last night, and as we're watching the credits go by, Joe says, "That was Harry Belafonte!"

Me: "Uh, who?"

Joe: "Harry Belafonte?! The old guy? He was a singer..."

Me: "Ohh-kaay."

A few more names roll by.

Joe: "Who's Joshua Jackson?"

Me, with a big smile: "Pacey from Dawson's Creek!"

True Alaskans

For the past few days, the weather here has been amazingly gorgeous. Joe and I were able to cook out, work in the yard, get sunburned, take the dogs on long walks, and I even wore flip flops to dinner on Saturday.

It never got above 50 degrees.

No. No! Noooo! Yes!

Oh NBC. How I love thee. Well, ok. Mostly just your Thursday nights. But still. You're seriously gonna make Lipstick Jungle into a series? Have you read the book? Sure it's by Candace Bushnell...and you're wishing and hoping you'll get the next Sex and the City. But you won't. I promise you. I wanted to slap each and every one of the characters in that book. Ugh. It made me that angry. And you're making a show out of it. You should probably rethink that move before the fall schedule starts.

But...no more Donald Trump? That just might even the score.

My productive husband

So the other morning, I'm at the base exchange, and see these cute little bird knicknacks. I had to get a few, because they're so tiny and cute. I mean, really. C'mon.

When Joe comes home from lunch, I show him my newest purchases.
He says this one looks like it's sitting on an eye.

And of course now that's all I can see when I look at it.

It doesn't end there, though.

Nooo.

After Joe gets home from work that afternoon, I notice a little something extra on the shelf.

It's Tweetor. Joe took the time to go to the Exchange, buy another bird, paint in an eye, and add blood stains under its beak. Oh, and make up a whole story to go along with it.

"He needs girl birds in metal bikinis surrounding him."

Ah...that's my Joe.

Eeep!

I was chosen for my first ever Treasury list on Etsy. Look, see (it's the light bulb photo...)

All thanks to Suuushi, who's from Fairbanks, Alaska. The list features all Alaskan artists. I'm in good company, right?

Etsy rocks.

VisualDNA

Imagini

It's fun. Give it a try.

Naah

I cannot even begin to tell you how much I like the goat in the new Aflac commercials. The duck is still annoying as hell...but that goat! Oooh.
My favorite commercial so far -ever- is the one for Mastercard with the elephant and the sick care taker. How sweet is that one?
I have a thing for commercials (and advertising in general). If I don't like the ad, I will go out of my way to not buy the product. Picky much? Probably. Maybe though it's the artist side of me. Or maybe it's the part that likes to make snap judgements.

Nah.

You may continue

My flowers are blooming in the garden!
...very excited.

Just had to pass that along.

Not-So-Weekly Recipe

I love carrot cake. Like, lovelove. I found a recipe online for a low-fat version, and modified it a little more. Here it is. Trust me, you'll lovelove it too.

Carrot Cake

ingredients

4 egg whites
1 1/2 cups white sugar
1/4 cup apple sauce
1/4 cup maple syrup
1 8oz can crushed pineapple, with juice
2 egg yolks
1/4 cup egg substitute
2 cups all-purpose unbleached flour
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 tablespoon ground cinnamon (I like to use a little extra)
1/2 teaspoon ground cloves (or pumpkin pie spice...)
1 teaspoon salt
3 cups finely grated carrots

directions

1. Preheat oven to 350*. Coat baking pans with cooking spray. Whip egg whites in a medium mixing bowl until stiff. Set aside.
2. Cream sugar, apple sauce, syrup, and can of pineapple in a large mixing bowl. Beat in egg yolks and egg substitute. Add flour, baking soda, cinnamon, cloves, and salt to mixing bowl, and beat on low speed until blended. Fold in egg whites. Stir in grated carrots and spoon mixture into prepared pan(s).
3. Bake for 30-40 minutes, or until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool completely before frosting.

A side note about the frosting: I've tried twice to make cream cheese frosting, and neither time it came out right. Save the hassle and buy it already made. After grating all those carrots, you'll thank yourself for at least one short cut!

The picture is a mini-cake. To make, do cupcakes. Cut off tops of cupcakes, and icing like normal. Viola...mini cake. Totally cute, right?

Enjoy!

You know it's true

Happy Arbor Day!


...Earth Day's ugly little sister.

So I'm reading this news story. Joe looks over my shoulder and says, "Yeah, I was reading that earlier, but didn't want to say anything to you, because I knew you'd get upset."

Me: "Um, yeeeeah." I went off, spouting different points from the article.

Joe: "That was all in the past. It was the 1940s. 'You've come a long way, baby!'"

Me, after a pause: "Did you just try to give me a motivational phrase from a cigarette company ad?"

Joe: "Uhh. Yes."

Earth II: The Return of Water, or the Earthening!

Have you seen this?
I love finding out about new planets. It's the future!

Scientists find most Earthlike planet yet

You never know, do you?

The other day, Joe and I headed into town for a few supplies. And by town, I mean Wal-Mart...because that's pretty much all there is. It was a nasty, gray, rainy day. We drive by an old man walking with crutches. Joe turns to me, and asks if I mind if we give the guy a ride.
"Um, really?" I ask, with flashes of mass murders going through my head.
"He's an old guy...with crutches...in the rain," he says.
I pause, again, and shrug. "If you want."
So we turn around, I roll down my window when we get close, and say: Excuse me, sir, would you like a ride?
He stops, looks at us and says, "Not unless you're going to Hell."

Seriously. He said that.

My eyes go huge, and I silently shake my head. Totally surprised. This dude looks like a slimmer Santa Claus, a nice old man.

"No? Well then..." and he walks off. I turn to Joe, and we just look at each other for a second.
Then Joe says, "Did he just say that...? What in the world did that mean?"
As we drive off, all I can say is "there are lots of strange people in the world."

Later, as we're walking out of Wal-Mart, we see the guy checking out at a register.
Going to Hell, huh? Well, I guess it was close enough.

It was bound to happen sometime...

Joe yelled at kids to get off our lawn.

Serious Oops

This past Monday afternoon, Joe and I took our dogs for a walk. King did the doo, and I scooped it up to take it to the trash. Right in front of the dumpster, I slipped on a patch of ice that was hiding under a layer of snow (because, hey, even though it's technically spring and all, we like our winter weather). I went down hard. Hard hard. It looked something like this:

Yes, chic sunglasses and all.

I have extreme swelling and the thigh-sized bruise befitting a X-games athlete. Ugh. How uncool am I?

Sad and disheartening

...shoveling snow on the first day of spring.

Sigh